A Farewell From Annie

Photo by Nelson Luna

Today is my last day at CreativeMornings. Without hyperbole, these past two years have been the happiest of my adult working life. I genuinely get to show up to work and spark creativity, joy, and play. I’ve taught people how to look at art, how to make zines, and how to be their bravest selves and put their creations out into the world. And I became a writer, something I had never imagined for myself. Thank you Tina, for manifesting your belief that work can be a playground for your future self. Because of what you and the CMHQ team have created, I get to walk into my future with bounding steps.

Today I am full of equal parts grief and gratitude, for having been the steward of something so precious and now learning to let it go. As a parting gift, here are some of the things I learned during my time at CreativeMornings.

Your career does not have to be the price you pay to have a life.

When I started this job in 2021, I was completely burnt out from a corporate job where work became increasingly abstract to me during the mind-numbing first year of the pandemic. More frustratingly, while the mission of my previous organization was (and still is) meaningful, the chasm between what I did and who I wanted to be only grew wider every day. This fueled a great deal of shame. When I started to tentatively tap the keys about creativity, I felt something click into place. Finally, I was doing work that felt aligned to my deepest held values. Writing to you all did more than change my relationship to work; it allowed me to heal. Plus, did I ever dream that there’d be a job that would REWARD my habit for having 500 tabs open at a time? I did not. So know this: soul-affirming work is out there, and it is waiting for you.

Your story is going to find the people who need to hear it.

When I write the global theme copy every month, each of those short vignettes contains a part of me. In particular, I wrote the Acceptance theme as a message I personally needed to hear. So when someone shared that they had copied my words into their journal, and translated it into their native language, to help them say a slow, tender goodbye to their mother, my eyes filled with tears.

Journal entry that reads “Embracing what cannot change can help you gather the energy to change what must. Accept these truths: you cannot make another person love or see you. You did not finish everything before the sun set on another day — and you didn’t need to. Every moment will pass, the blissful and the excruciating. It’s the hardest lesson, but one we need the most: the grace to let go” along with the Portuguese translation “A graça de deixar ir”

In his poem “Why Bother?”, Sean Thomas Dougherty answers the titular question: “Because right now there is someone / Out there with / a wound in the exact shape / of your words.” All I’ve ever wanted was for my words to reach someone and help them through the dark hours of their pain. Now I can trust that they will make their way through the breach to whoever needs them.

Your people are here.

Stepping into the creative universe can be intimidating. Everyone is so freaking talented, it can make you want to recede into a wall. But through this community, I have met the most brilliant, generous, and kind people who blew my world wide open and embraced me exactly as I am. I met a gorgeous human being who taught me how to officiate a wedding. To draw the shape of my feelings. To write poems in a dream state. To become fast friends in FieldTrip breakout rooms. To hug each other tightly. To tell our most heart-breaking stories so that we might help others. And I’d be remiss to not thank my three managers, who each showed me how to lead with empathy, softness, and trust. And of course, my creative soul sister and partner-in-crime, Exa Kutler, who taught me that tending to the scared, vulnerable parts of ourselves is the ultimate form of magic. And YOU! I’ve had the pleasure of meeting you here, in the vast yawning spaces of the internet. If you are tired of cynicism or surface interactions that feel transactional, if you seek authenticity and realness and hope, you belong here.

Photo by Ella Mettler

You are not alone on this journey. I am with you. I believe creative expression and community are the essential antidotes to despair and loneliness. So please, stay in touch. I will continue to give tours at the National Gallery of Art and would love to have you on one! And if you drop by CreativeMornings/DC’s events, hosted by the inimitable Obi Okolo, don’t be shy — say hello and you’ll get the tightest hug from me!

Waving, always,

Annie